Hi Friends! I am linking up with Jen, Joanne and the Girls for NAJM
This month we are prompted to share How We Became A Mom
This is a complicated one for me.
I first became a Stepmom. I guess it was officially in 2004 when I married my husband Rob but truth be told, I became a parent to them as soon as we started dating. At that time, in 2002 ish, Zach was 6, Ally was 8 and Kayla was 12.
It was all Rainbows and Unicorns when we started dating. I fell so hard in love that I didn't think about anything else. I thought I would just deal with whatever was thrown at me- ha!
It was 10 solid years of true parenting, at home...and parenting kids that weren't technically mine. Was it painful? Yes! Was it stressful? Double Yes! Did I mess up and make mistakes? Hell Yes!
But was it joyful? YES...it really was
I think fondly of our time through softball for the girls and football for Zach...school shows and concerts...parent teacher conferences...play dates...parties...trips to the beach...and all of the laughs we had. We also shared our family dog, our English Bulldog Bambi. We built a great life together :)
I know God put me where I was supposed to be. I think the little family we created was a true gift- we needed each other more than we knew.
Kayla is now 33, happily married and expecting her first child! She has a successful career in insurance claims and works a mean Cricut ;)
Ally is now 30 and dating a gentleman she is madly in love with. She has a successful career as a Credentialing Specialist for a Medical Staffing Firm nearby. She also sells hair products on the side and loves all of the social media that goes with that.
Zach is now 27 and dating a wonderful girl Zoe who has become family to us. He has a dynamite career in Med Device Sales and he is getting ready to move to North Carolina to be with Zoe. They have been having a long distance relationship over the last year. This is going to be a hard one. He is the spirit of our family- the faithful friend and wonderful son and brother and it is just going to be HARD. We are so happy for him and Zoe though and would never hold him back!
So I have been a Stepmom for 21 years! Wow...when did that happen?
Anyway, as I said, things are complicated, because I became a Biological Mom in 2008 when I gave birth to our little bundle of joy Diana on August 24th. True to form, she made a long and dramatic entrance into this world. I was in labor for 36 hours and pushed for a few and then she had to be taken via emergency C section- still true to form today ;)
Diana's first year of life was very rough. She was extremely sick. It was constant.
In between being stressed and trying to catch our breaths, she did bring joy to the whole family. It was like magic. She brought us all closer together and the kids loved to be around and be part of her life!
When I think back to that first year, I remember some joy but honestly I was so stressed about her health and trying to juggle motherhood and working full time. I had some flexibility but not like now so it was tough.
As Diana passed the one-year mark, her health became better so I was a little less stressed.
I made a move to a new company which gave me more flexibility so I really started to enjoy motherhood more and more.
Six years later, I gave birth to Sweet Baby Eva. She completed our family and was the EASIEST baby. Her birth happened via a scheduled C Section and she was delivered on April 24th, 2014 at 10am sharp- my favorite time of day :)
Funny story- I would always stand over her crib waiting for her to get sick. I even bought the special formula that Diana required in order to live, thinking she would be just as sick. Well, thank God, it never happened. She thrived from day one and was PURE JOY!
We are now the blended family we were meant to be. Life isn't easy but it never is and I will tell you I strive to live by my mantra always which is
Follow The JOY :)
Hope that gives you a little glimpse of my road to become a Mom...the Stepmom/Bonus Mom and The Mom XO
That was fun to read, Holly! I can imagine that being a step parent was hard when the kids were teenagers. It sounds like your lovely spirit shone through even with the inevitable mistakes that all parents- step or not make and you and the kids get along so well. I feel your stress of having a sick baby and a workplace that was not flexible. That was my exact situation and it led, in part, to me quitting working altogether. My employer was known as being a great place to work but it was not super flexible and that led to so much additional stress like having a child who needed a number of procedures as a baby. Ugh. Thanks for sharing your story!
ReplyDeleteI love your story Holly. Thank you so much for sharing it with us.
ReplyDeleteAw, what a special family! Not easy to be a step-parent I'm sure, but the love was there!
ReplyDeleteThank you for linking up with us!
It is so interesting reading how everyone became a mom, everyone's story sure is different.
ReplyDeleteYou have such a beautiful family.
I loved reading this! I had no idea you became a step mom when the kids were so young! That must have been so challenging. I enjoyed reading the birth stories too!
ReplyDeleteI loved reading this! I was just 5 when my step-father and mom got married and I know I have him so much grief; especially during those pre-teen/teen years and he was such a trooper. You have a beautiful family.
ReplyDeleteWhat a lovely story!! I bet it was quite the challenge to become stepmom to a ready made family, but it looks like you handled it with grace and joy. I loved reading your birth stories too, and seeing the pictures of your beautiful and perfectly blended family.
ReplyDeleteI love this story! I also had a complicated birth with Addison, was in long labor, pushed for hours, with epidural not working, and had to have an emergency C-section. Thank you for sharing your beautiful journey!
ReplyDeleteI love your story friend! And I am right there with you in the emergency c-section club.
ReplyDeleteHugs to your beautiful family you have created.
Patty